Showing posts with label max's kansas city. Show all posts
Showing posts with label max's kansas city. Show all posts

Sunday, February 6, 2011

MAYBE TOMORROW - A novel by Peter Nolan Smith Chapter 7


Sean woke to a throbbing headache, swollen knuckles, and a delirious argument about Robert Kennedy’s having contracted his brother’s death to avenge Marilyn Monroe’s murder by the FBI.

Opening his eyes, he discovered that he was naked in Cheri’s old room.

The afternoon sun was slipping below New Jersey’s low skyline across the river painting a silver glimmer on the ominous clouds’ underbelly. Most of today, which was Thanksgiving was gone and he settled into the pillow with images of last night screening in his head as a film burnt by a bulb; the Ramones, the beers, the fight outside, the chorus from T-Rex BANG-A-GONG, and then a blank coma until now, which had a simple explanation.

Johnny had drugged him at the bar.

Johnny had brought him to the hotel.

Johnny had undressed him.

In a dazed panic Sean tottered across the room to his jeans. He fumbled with his wallet, expecting the worst, except his money was still there. Relieved on his fear he collapsed on the bed, destined for another bout of unconsciousness, except a brunette in a Chinese silk bathrobe entered the room. Sean blinked to clear his eyes and croaked, "Cheri."

The thin artist smiled, as if yesterday's vanishing act had been a joke.

"I'll show you funny." Sean leapt from the bed and yanked the brunette by the hair to discover that he had ripped a wig off Johnny’s head.

Stunned by Cheri’s second disappearance, he sputtered, "C-ch-cheri____."

Sensing Sean wasn’t amused by his deception, Johnny backed away out of striking distance. "Cheri left me her clothes, but I had you fooled, right?"

The car thief responded with a punch to the wall.

A crack snaked from ceiling to floor and the shouting ceased next door. He whacked the wall with repeated rights and lefts.

”Enough already.” Johnny bearhugged the hippie, who didn’t put up much resistance, and said, “Bet you freaked your parent, teachers, psychiatrists, and girlfriends with this violent streak, even more after you told them it excited you.”

”I wasn’t that way as a kid.” Sean’s daily beatings by his 7th Grade schoolmates was a secret that he wasn’t sharing with a man disguised as his ex-lover and he shook off the guitarist. "Did you drug me?"

The truth was more convenient than Johnny’s initial impulse to lie. “I slipped two Quaaludes in your beer.”

“Why?” Last night Sean would have voluntarily downed the muscle relaxants.

“Cheri was supposed to be the lead singer in my band and you scared her off with your puppy dog love.” Johnny glanced at the hippie’s crotch. Unexpectedly aroused by the longhair’s Neanderthalism he tightened the robe’s belt around his waist and leaned against the doorjamb. “So I decided to rip you off.”

"But you didn’t?" Sean was unnerved by Johnny’s stare.

"You protected me.” Johnny’s code of ethics arose from an instinct for survival, instead of greed. “Not many people do that.”

"I would have helped anyone.” Sean pulled on his jeans and searched for his shirt.

“But you helped me.”

“I’m straight.”

“No one said you were gay.” A majority of the hustlers on 8th Avenue were heterosexual, saying they were on the game for the money, but Johnny knew better. His first sex with a male had been with an older man in the bathroom of a 42nd Street movie theater. He had been twelve. The bald man’s fellating him was more satisfying than the parish priest’s furtive groping, though not as intoxicating as his experiments with Dave. In Florida he had tried to date girls. Getting to first base had proved too much work. Men were so much more easy. They never said stop.

“I know how you people think.” Sean’s friends at Boston’s 1270 Club asserted no man was completely straight.

“Spare me the ‘you people’ bias.” Johnny favored straight men; ironworkers, sailors and firemen to gays. “Besides I’m not here to discuss sexual hang-ups. Reason #2 why I didn’t rip you off is that yesterday I met this rich kid. We formed a rock band GTH. Going To Hell. He’s the organist, I’m on guitar, and my friend, Frankie, is on the drums. Cheri was supposed to be the singer, but we’ll find another girl quick. How you like to be bass?”

"I haven't played bass in years." Sean had mastered the chords for DIRTY WATER, WIPEOUT, FEVER, HEART OF SOUL, and several garage hits in 1967 without achieving any virtuosity on the instrument.

"Most musicians on the punk scene haven’t struck a triangle in a school play.” Musicians generally regarded bassists as one step above roadies, although The JBs’ master, Fred Thomas, had unceremoniously carried James Brown to the pinnacle of Funk.“Cheri mentioned you were a poet. Maybe we can cannibalize a poem for lyrics."

“I might have one or two.” Sean’s skepticism about Johnny’s proposition was blinded by a vision of rock and roll stardom.

“Good.” Johnny baited his interest further. “Music consists of chords. Chords played at the same time and speed with other instruments. All you have to learn for punk are three-chord progressions in certain keys. No one has to be Mozart. We rehearse a month and put on a couple of showcases. I have connections in the record business and within two months, we'll sign a contract.”

"Overnight success rarely happens overnight for anyone around from the beginning.” Sean had watched Aerosmith struggle for years in a cramped apartment on Commonwealth Avenue. They would have starved if it wasn’t for the generosity of BU co-eds.

"You’re right.” The hippie wasn’t stupid, once you discounted his falling in love with Cheri. “Being in a band is hard work.”

“I’m not scared of work.” Sean had driven taxi eight hours a night to pay for college.

“So you want to be a rock and roll star?” The question had been a hit for the Byrds in 1967.

Sean hesitated for a second. This stranger had dosed him with ‘Ludes. He was gay and a possible drug addict, but this very risky long shot offered a better option than hitchhiking to LA to sleep on the beach.

"Sure, why not?" It wasn’t like Johnny was going to mickey him again.

"Then come to my room. I have a bass with your name on it." Johnny snatched his wig off the floor and Sean followed him down the hallway to room 314.

"You'll have to excuse the mess.” Johnny opened the door.

The room was slightly bigger than #301, yet was crowded to the ceiling by the hundreds of LPs and 45s precariously piled against the walls. Unmatched shoes cluttered the floor and three amps towered over the bed. A blowdown of guitars was stacked in the corner and Johnny picked up to a Fender Bass. "Play that."

"Now?" It had been over ten years since he last held a bass.

"Ain't no time like the right time,” the guitarist quoted the old Blues Project song.

"And, baby, the right time is now." Sean’s fingers crabbed over the thick strings trying to find the corresponding chords. 


“Close.” Johnny responded with encouragement.

”But not every close.” The years of neglect had erased every progression from his memory.

”Playing bass is like falling off a bike. You’ll remember it if it hurts.” Johnny plugged the guitar and bass in two small Peavey Amps, emitting matching buzzes and the thump of the bass.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’ll find out soon enough.” The guitarist reduced the volume. “My neighbors sleep late. You know the song LOUIE LOUIE?"

“Of course.” The Kingsmen’s cover of Richard Berry’s song had surprised everyone in 1964.

”Watch my fingers. These are the basslines.” Johnny strummed the four classic chords and Sean clumsily repeated AAA*/*DD*/EEEE/*DD*/AAA*/*DD*/*DD*/EEEE/*DD*.

"You weren’t lying about being in a band.” Johnny arched an eyebrow.

“All the cover bands played LOUIE LOUIE in 1968.” Sean missed the bridge and apologized for the error.

“As long as you learn from your mistakes, no problem. Now follow me.” Johnny guided the ex-hippie through the chorus, bridge, and hook. Sean followed doggedly for several minutes, appreciating the economy of Johnny’s style. "You weren’t lying about being in a band. You’re great.”

"Me and about ten thousand other lead guitarists in America, but the core of LOUIE LOUIE is the basis of punk, except it’s faster and louder and stripped down to the basics." Johnny cued a 45 on a dusty stereo. "Here’s an oldie from your hometown. DIRTY WATER.”

“The Standells weren’t from Boston.” DIRTY WATER had been the encore of that fateful pool party in 1967 and his fingers fumbled over the frets. "Sorry."

“Don’t say sorry, until you’ve done something really wrong.” Johnny recalled his own traumatic birth on guitar and strummed a chord in imitation of the Who’s Pete Townsend. "Plus you can’t get any worst, right?"

"I'm not so sure about that."

“Let me help you.” The guitarist positioned the hippie's fingers to an e-chord and started strumming his guitar fast. “We’re going to play this chord over and over again.”

“How many times?” Sean’s fingertips were red from abuse.

“You’ll when to stop.” Fifteen minutes later Sean put down the bass. His hands had reached their limit.

"That's enough for today." Johnny turned off the amps

“Great.” Sean balanced the bass against the wall and stood up to leave, even though he had nowhere to go.

"Take it with you. It’s yours."

"I can't." He wasn’t sure if he could ever play bass.

"It's not a gift. It's an apology.” It was the least he could offer for having dosed the hippie last evening.

“I’m not a musician.” Sean wanted to dip his fingers in ice.

“Trust me, you will be.” Johnny threw on a leather coat and swept a handful of coins from the table. “Wait a few minutes here, I have to call the drummer and the rich kid.”

The door shut and Sean flexed his fingers. Whatever Johnny’s game was, he was certain that the pain in his fingers would never translate into skill. If he left tomorrow morning, he could be in LA within five or six days. He was almost out the door, but caught the cover of AFTER BATHING AT BAXTER'S on the floor.

He had listened to the Jefferson Airplane’s third album a thousand times at his hometown library and reverently withdrew the vinyl disc from the sleeve. The surface was unscratched and he cued SPARE CHAYNGE on Side B. Picking up the bass he ineffectively tried to match Jack Cassady’s solo by plunking single notes on the top steel string. Johnny was right. If he practiced three or four hours a day, he would improve over time, never to perfection, but Sean decided to stick it out with GTH to achieve a long suppressed boyhood fantasy of rock and roll fame.

As Grace Slick sang the lines to COMBS IN HIS HAIR, Johnny entered the room and remarked, “I have to say this about the Airplane. They followed the very successful SURREALISTIC PILLOW with a devastatingly uncommercial LP and I respect them for freaking out the record company people by dosing the golden goose of Flower Power with LSD. How are your hands?"

"They feel like the Mafia failed to pull out my nails."

“It’ll get worst before it gets better.” Johnny smiled at the hippie’s simple humor and said, “I told you about this rich kid. We’re meeting Little Richie Rich at Max's. It was Warhol’s old hang-out and they put on a Turkey dinner for the punks.”

"Do the Underground go to Max’s?" The flame in his heart for Nico burned with eternal devotion.

"Sometimes Lou Reed shows up, but he’s more into trannies than hippies." Johnny tugged on Sean’s thatched roof of split ends. "And this is seven years too Woodstock for CBGBs."

”You think I need a haircut.” Sean recollected Cheri's calling his hair a mane. The compliment had become an insult and he touched the scraggly hair.

"More a mowing. Come with me." Johnny dragged Sean to a hallway alcove, where a beer-bellied drunk slept on a distressed Barcalounger.

"Hey, Dynamite, time to work." Johnny knocked on the doorframe.

”What the fuck?” The alcholic’s eyes were the color of ham and eggs. He focused on Johnny and groused, "Ya shoulda cum befer I drunk my wine."

Two empty Muscatel bottles lay at his feet.

”I can afford a barbershop?"

"There aren't any more 'real' barbershops and course hair salons are fine, if you want a suedehead like Danny Terrio.” Most American women loved TV’s SOLID GOLD puppy-cute disco-dancing host. The girls at CBGB’s preferred scruffy over spit and polish. "If you’re after disco, you can join ten million people wearing polyester dancing to the 110 beats per minute, otherwise I'm giving you the chance to kill that unhappy hippie beating up a car.”

"Did I look that unhappy?” He had been blinded by the rush of blood..

“Almost suicidal.” There was nothing to gain by sparing the hippie the truth. “Or murderous.”

”That bad.”

”But not as bad as that hair.” “Okay, I surrender." Sean had grown his hair to emulate the flowing locks of the Ultimate Spinach's guitarist. Not one girl in Boston had ever noticed the similarity. He sat on a three-legged stool and the puffy-faced drunk lifted a pair of shiny scissors.

“Nuttin’ to worry ‘bout, hippie boy. I usta cut hair fer da Marines."

"No buzzcuts."

“Well, it ain’t gonna just be a trim either.”

For the next five minutes Dynamite mercilessly shorn his head. Each snip strangely lightened his head, as Johnny spoke about various bands at CBGBs and Max’s; the Ramones, Television, Cramps, Dictators, Wayne County, the Mumps, the Voidoids, Heartbreakers, and their vain struggles against the power structure of radio.

“AM won’t give any punk songs a shot, despite the length of the 45s being tailor-made for their format. The Ramones are trying to release ROCAKWAY BEACH waiting for next summer, but the DJs don’t want to risk their careers on a band that also recorded I WANNA BE SEDATED, so instead the kids get SILLY LOVE SONGS and DISCO DUCK and FM is worse with the DJs pretending to be hip, but we’re going to change all that. You, me, and GTH.”

“We are?” Sean liked a good fight, but challenging th had learned teaching at South Boston High School that the st

“Congress controls the FCC, which in turn instructs the radio stations which songs to play. They even had J. Edgar Hoover investigate LOUIE LOUIE for depravity.”

“There was no ‘fuck’ in that song.” Sean had played the 45 a hundred times without hearing the infamous swear word. Millions of other teenagers had conducted their own research with similar results.

”Of course not. The reason they tried to suppress LOUIE LOUIE was that it broke the format and now regional radio stations are switching to single-format playlists, making it impossible for local bands to break nationally without a push from the record companies who aren’t interested in anything other than the steady diet of crap to placate the parents of tomorrow by spinning rock ‘classics’. Nothing new. Always HEY JUDE or STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN or worst.”

“So it’s one big plot?” Sean was hoping that Dynamite would stop soon.

“No one’s that smart, are they?”

"No one has to be smart to fool the American Public.” Dynamite lowered the scissors and slumped into the Barcalounger. “HL Mencken said that or something like it.”

"How's it look?" Sean’s head felt like another person’s skull.

"Like you were just paroled from prison, but the girls at CBs will die for you.” Johnny brushed off his new friend’s shoulders and stuck five dollars in Dynamite's top pocket. “Now for a change of wardrobes.”

“What’s wrong with these?" The Levi bell-bottoms were from Walker’s on Boylston Street.

"If you have to ask, then you might be a lose cause." Johnny led Sean to his room, where he culled a pair of black jeans and a torn t-shirt from a clump of clothing.

"Try them on. I promise I won’t peek when you’re taking off those hippie rags.”

Sean smelled the clothes. They were relatively clean and he stripped off his jeans and teeshirt.

“I don’t know about this.” The new clothing was tight enough to have been plundered from a younger sister's closet and he wished that the management of the Terminal Hotel had provided mirrors in the rooms, but it was probably for the best that their tenants never saw their reflection at this late stage of the game.

"You'll fit in at CBs just fine.” Johnny handed the ex-hippie a pair of suede black boots to complete the outfit. “You hungry?"

"A little." Pulling on the boots Sean was magically two inches taller than in his Frye boots. His mother had burned his pointy-toed Cuban heels after the Hung’s final performance in 1966.

"Like I said Max’s having a Thanksgiving dinner for punk orphans.” Johnny was changing into the same clothes as the previous evening. “It won’t have mom’s apple pie, but the food won’t kill us.”

"MY friend Red Tate used to say ‘Whatever doesn’t kill you will make you wish you were dead.”

”A wise man.” Johnny was liking the ex-hippie more than was good for a hustler. His blue eyes threatened to hurt any casual lover and Johnny warned himself that falling in love was for suckers.

"The wisest in town.” Red Tate would fit right in at the Terminal Hotel and Sean thought about home for a second. His mother would be serving dessert to his father, brothers, and sisters. A few friends were always invited to fill out the table. They had to be asking where he was and he swore to phone them later.

”Wisdom in short demand in this hotel, but you were smart to not leave New York. You have a new look, a kicking bass, and a warm place to sleep.” Johnny didn’t expect thanks for these gifts and shut off the lights. “Plus I have a proposition for you.”

”What?” He doubted that it was legal.

”I’ll tell you about it tomorrow, but for now let's go. That food won’t last forever.” Johnny pushed Sean out of the room and locked the door. It wasn’t much protection against a professional thief, but most of the residents of the Terminal Hotel were on disability and practiced honesty in everything other than lying to themselves.

They hurried down the stairs into the lobby, where Sean caught the reflection in a cracked mirror and tried to fingercomb the spikes out of his hair.

“Stop. That’s a million dollar look."

"More a million lira." Ernie shouted from his post. “In a $1 bag.”

Johnny flipped the old drunk the bird.

“One day I have to leave this shithole.”

They exited from the hotel into the icy night. A frigid wind gnawed through their clothing and Sean wished her was wearing a sweater. under his leather jacket. Johnny hailed a Chevy taxi and they jumped in the back, happy to be warm.

”Max’s in Union Square.”

”I know the spot.” The driver had a heavy foot with the gas and criticized the country with a manic intensity.

“We’re lettin’ in too many foreigners into America. One day this city won't have any American-speakin’ taxi drivers." The rant lasted for the entire ride.

"At least we won't have to listen to foreign idiots," Johnny whispered, as the taxi braked in front of the Max's.

Half-heartedly subscribing to the driver's prophecy, Sean tipped the driver a dollar before getting out of the Checker.

That was generous,” Johnny commented on the sidewalk.

I drove cab in college.” It seemed colder here than on the river with a sharp wind slipstreaming through the park. Clouds were lowering in the evneing sky. Coming from New England Sean could feel snow in the air..

”Are we going inside?” The soles of the boots were paper-thin.

”Just a second.” Johnny lingered on the sidewalk to greet three skinny girls in plastic jackets and pants. They peered over his shoulder at Sean and Johnny said, "This is Sean, our new bass.”

“You’re starting a new band?” the cutest girl asked and Johnny said, “GTH. Going to Hell’.”

“Sexy devils,” the three girls cooed with Jersey accents and the shortest girl flirted with Sean. “You speak or you the strong silent type?”

“I___” he managed to say before Dove exited from the club with a Slavic-skulled man in his twenties. The blonde was wearing a slick white leather coat and eyed the newly scalped Sean with a withering yearning.

"Appears you have another convert to the cause, Johnny. He playin' for your team?"

"No, he’s on the I-want-girls side," Johnny snapped and Dove quickly retorted, "How he’d feel about being traded to the in-between league?"

Her escort's face muddied with murder and Dove quelled his jealousy with a kiss, then entered the taxi with a wink at Sean.

"Is Dove’s friend aware she's a he?"

"Dove has this strange power to suspend men’s belief in reality with the promise of dirty weekend in a cheap hotel." Johnny hoped Dove was careful with this Russian mafia thug. A 9th Precinct cop had mumbled a nasty tale about his reputed KGB connections. They sold icons and bad paper, also killed people that they didn’t like whenever they were drunk and snorting coke.

"I'd never mistake her for a woman." The Adam's apple and oversized hands were dead giveaways.

"No one mistakes Dove for anything more than what she is, but remember the word 'never' has a funny way of becoming always in New York.”

“Thanks for the warning."

Johnny and Sean walked through the shrouded entrance into the bar, where the jukebox was playing IMAGINE. One of the girls kicked the machine and the record skipped to the Kinks’ ALL OF THE DAY. Sean tried to rake his hair into order and Johnny drew away his hand.

"I told you before messy's in. Play your cards right and you'll get laid plenty, because we’re here for sex, drugs, and rock and rock, right?"

”I guess so.” Sean’s habitual drug use of marijuana and LSD had vaporized his college years. He had first had sex with his father’s secretary. Other girls had followed, although never enough to satisfy his libido. Maybe it’d be different in New York. “I like those girls.”

”The three from Jersey. We can do better than that.” Johnny gestured for the skinny hangers-on to scram and the trio sat at a wall booth with two members of the nearly defunct New York Dolls. The bartender placed a vodka-tonic in front of Johnny and asked Sean, "Drink?"

"A Heineken and a plate of turkey," Sean answered and a frosty green bottle was slammed on the bar. When he sniffed at the mouth of the bottle, Johnny asked, "I wouldn’t try that twice?"

"You told me 'never trust anyone', right?"

"Glad you're listening." Johnny nodded to the manager of the scene’s top electronic duo.

"Everyone here your friend?"

"A novelist wrote if you had two friends, you were blessed. Three meant you were a liar. These people are no one’s friend.” Johnny pointed to a pasty-faced man wearing black lipstick. “That thin man in the corner.”

“The Josef Goebbels look-alike?” Sean had studied German in high school and college.

"Klaus is a cook by day and at night an opera singer with an unearthly castrati alto, though his balls are intact." Johnny shifted his attention to a Latin brunette with an angelic face. "Maria is sixteen. A Wall Street banker pays for her acting lessons around the corner at the Adler School, but she prefers balling musicians more than the executive or Lee Strasberg.”

"Maybe I'll get lucky one day."

"Sorry, bass players get the girls.”

"McCartney got Linda Eastman.”

“Don’t mention his name in my presence. John was the best Beatle, although Yoko was no prize either. Why don’t you get yourself some food.” Johnny pointed to the buffet against the wall. “Happy Thanksgiving.”

”What about you?”

”I’m a light eater.” Johnny hadn’t eaten in two days and felt no hunger.

As you like it.”

Johnny leaned against the bar and observed the ex-hippie load his plate with free food. His manners bespoke a middle-class family background in Boston. He should have been working at a bank or a law firm and Johnny suspected that the detour from his destiny had something to do with his violent streak. Any further conjecture was postponed by Frankie's exit from the bathroom.

The teenager was high and Johnny grabbed his arm.

”What?”

”I have someone I want you to meet.” Johnny pulled Frankie over to the table at which Sean was sitting.

“Sean, this is Frankie. He's the drummer for GTH. Sean’s our bass.”

“And Cheri?” Frankie shook the stranger’s hand, remarking on the lack of calluses on his fingertips. He was no musician. No one on this scene was anything, but a cheap show.

“She left for Paris.” Johnny’s eyes flashed a warning for Frankie to drop the subject. “We’ll find another singer.”

Frankie was glad to hear Cheri was out of the band.

"So where's our angel?"

"Angel?” Sean imagined that he had misheard the young boy.

"He’s talking about Charles, our organist. And there’s nothing celestial about him other than he hasn't been in public much, so both of you act cool or else he'll retreat back to his monastery. There he is.”

Charles Ames III was at the door, wearing newly purchased punk attire.

With the new haircut the three girls in plastic mistook him for Brian Eno, Roxy Music’s keyboard player. Johnny saved Charles from utter confusion by saying, “He’s with me.”

“Sorry, Johnny.” The girls went back to the Dolls’ table and the guitarist led away the shaken millionaire. "Glad you made it."

"This is the place?" Charles surveyed the dingy bar.

The stark interior was a stunning contrast to the Carlyle Hotel’s luxurious Bemelsman Room, where he had earlier dined with his father, a woman eager to become the fourth Mrs. Charles Ames II, and his sister. None of them had commented about his haircut, although during dessert his sister Caroline had asked if he were attending a Halloween party. He hadn’t bothered to answer her glib jibe and had excused himself from dinner earlier than expected, but his family was used to his unexplained departures.

"It’s early and the show happens upstairs much later.” He handed Charles earplugs to lessen the volume of the Dictators' CARS AND GIRLS on the jukebox. "Stick these in your ears."

"Thanks." Max’s lacked Times Square’s energy, but its inhabitants belonged to a same class of people as those lurking along 8th Avenue. Charles didn’t belong here. His family mixed with the elite from Sutton Place, Millbrook, and Palm Beach. The previous generation had produced a senator and several judges, yet Charles Ames III stood to gain nothing by following the footsteps of his predecessors.

“This isn’t about Max’s.” Johnny called over the other two band members. “Frankie and Sean have been in bands and you’ll learn fast, Charles, plus the music business has always been more about faddy appearance than anything else and they have this new way of showing music called ‘videos’, which will help sell records. The mop tops made the Beatles, the Dolls without the drag clothes were a flash sensation, and Elvis minus the sequins was a fat slob. If the look is right, then you can fake the music. Are you in or out?"

Riding in the Lincoln had exhausted its possibilities. "When do we start?"

"I've rented us a place in Chinatown to rehearse."

Charles Ames III had been dreading this moment since meeting the blonde hustler.

"Do you need anything?"

"No, I covered the first month.” Nothing scares off a rich person faster than a poor person asking for money, even if it’s one dollar, then again this wasn’t a rip-off. This was the start of a band. “After that we'll kick in equal shares."

"I don't have an organ." The guitarist’s refusal delighted Charles.

"Go to Sam Ash in Times Square and ask for Slow Ed. He deals with the keyboards. Buy a B-3. Used, if possible. Pay him in green and you won't have to pay the tax." Johnny received a 10% commission from recommended sales for cash transactions. "Can we meet tomorrow Eight O’clock at the Terminal Hotel?"

"The Terminal Hotel?" Charles doubted that any his family had stayed at this establishment.

"Oh, it's a real treat on Jane Street. Your driver will find it.”

“I’ll be waiting on the steps,” Frankie said eagerly, for Charles was the epitome of a prince in this city. Johnny had come through again in a big way and this time for a trip to the big leagues.

"I’ll be there on time." Sean nervously wolfed the rest of his turkey.

“You live there.” Johnny laughed, “You better be on time. Anyone up for CBGBs?”

“CBGBs?”

“It's the less classy bookend to this place."

"Less classy than this?" Charles didn’t really care, for any bar was more cheerful than the hospital room in which his back and head had been stretched by wires to reconnect his neck to his spine.

"The Bowery is worst than Union Square. Where’s your car?”

“Outside.” The Lincoln’s engine was running to facilitate any get-away.

“Great, we’ll be riding in style.”

The four of them left Max’s and got into Charles' ride without noticing a short-set man in a black sweater writing down the license plate.

The Lincoln made the light at 14th Street and a voice from Union Square Park shouted Nick Arcc’s name. The furry twenty-five year-old turned to see a quartet of scrawny musicians from Cleveland walking across the street. He greeted them with a smile, for The Dead Boys’ pockmarked singer with the Prince Valiant haircut was most assuredly his type.

“How’s it going, boys.”

“We’re ready for turkey and drinks,” the mottle-skinned bass declared in the moth-bitten leopard-skin pants and the A & R man announced, "First round on me."

As the band cheered his generosity, the bearish A&R man checked the license number. Its beginning with a number instead of Z indicated that the Lincoln was privately owned. The pale punk in the new clothes came from real money and Nick Arcc wasn’t above weaseling in on another hustler’s game. Only time would reveal, if it was for pleasure as well as profit.

Saturday, February 5, 2011

MAYBE TOMORROW - A novel by Peter Nolan Smith Chapter 8

The two-day break from shooting dope had reduced Johnny to a shivering shell, but at least it was warm in his room, for snowflakes were falling outside his window. Judging from the weak light of day, he guessed the time to be a few hours past dawn. Every ounce of his body begged him to stay in bed, instead he got up and dressed in a matter of minutes, then walked down the hallway to room 301 and knocked hard on the door.

”What is it?” Sean opened the door with a sheet wrapped around him.

"We have to get equipment for the band." The only way GTH would happen was if Johnny did everything, so the other band members only had to worry about the music.

"Like what?" Sean scratched his head, as if he expected that he still had long hair.

"I'll tell you on the way. Get dressed and meet me in the lobby.” Johnny walked down the stairs on uneasy legs. A shot would staighten him out, but he didn’t want Charles to see him in his natural state.

"Looking good this morning.” Earl sneered from the desk. The alkie was no stranger to withdrawal symptoms from booze and appreciated someone else suffering for a change.

”Fuck you, Ernie.” Johnny committed this moment to his memory. His revenge would come the next time the desk clerk was three quarters short of a bottle of Thunderbird.

”Mighty touchy this morning.” Ernie returned to his newspaper. it was from two days ago.

Five minutes later Sean entered the lobby and Johnny wrapped his arms around his chest, as they walked to 8th Avenue to get a taxi.

”Do we really need to be doing this now?” Sean had drunk ten beers at CBGBs last night.

”Being in a band requires more than songs. Normally a manager might get equipment, but GTH doesn’t have a manager. Right now it’s you and me, unless you want to go back to the Terminal Hotel and be a bum.”

”No, I’m with you.” Sean spotted a cab and lifted his hand.

Once they were inside Johnny directed the driver Lower Manhattan stopping at various apartments to scavenge equipment from unhappy musicians, who also liked to see late.

Charles Bobo Shaw lent a drum kit for Frankie and Johnny redeemed a twitchy monitor system from a pawnshop on 3rd Avenue. They brought everything back to the Hotel Terminal.

”Ernie, we’ll be leaving this shit in the closet for a few hours.” Johnny gave the clerk two bottles of Zapple wine. “Make sure no one steals it.”

”No one steal anything in the Termimal, but time.” Ernie unscrewed the cap of one bottle and slugged down a big gulp. “It aint’ thunderbird, but it ain’t milk either. Thanks, Johnny.”

”I take care of your end. You take care of mine.” Johnny and Sean crammed the lobby closet with the equipment and then retreated to room 314 in the Hotel Terminal, where they adapted Sean’s poems LOVE NO LOVE, and TAKE ME HIGHER into songs.

Sean's lessons on bass were torture. The tips of his fingers were bloody after three songs.

"Don't worry, they'll be fine in a week." Johnny called their creative session to a halt and they killed the wait for Frankie by sampling Johnny’s record collection; Serge Gainsbourg’s BALLAD OF MELODY NELSON, Françoise Hardy’s PREMIERE BONJOUR DU JOUR, Brigitte Bardot’s HARLEY DAVIDSON, Spirit’s WE GOT NOTHING TO HIDE, Clear Light’s MR. BLUE, Judas Priest’s HEAD OUT ONTO THE HIGHWAY, Jeff Beck’ AIN’T SUPERSTIOUS, Joe Tex’s I DON’T BUMP WITH NO BIG FAT WOMEN, and David Porter’s SLOOPY. Songs the radio exiled from their playlists in favor of Captain and Tenille.

“It’s all about controlling the market.” Johnny had heard the stories from various underlings in the music industry. “When we’re kids, the ads told us to eat candy and buy toys and see movies and watch TV. You and I have fewer and fewer choices and music suffers from the same dilemma. The corporate executives expect us to act in a certain way, so years later we’ll react to the proper stimuli and buy the right cars, appliances, and presidents. Luckily punk is a detour from the traffic-jammed freeway of consumerism. They might have the cops to keep us from the off-ramps, only we’re running right through the road blocks.”

“You think ‘they’ will let ‘us’ stop people from buying shit?” Sean had no illusions about money’s influence over their free choice. Americans purchased cars with no style and consumptive gas mileage, drank a teeth-eating soda, and tobacco killed hundreds of thousands of people each year.

“A little, if they can make money from us at the same time.” Johnny had read Marx, Engels, Mao, and Lenin without translating the communist tracts into revolutionary actions, since his devotion to anarchy resisted authority at any level.

“Isn’t that a sell-out?”

“Even the MC5 had to eat. Didn’t you say that they played at your high school?”

“Yeah, my all-boys school raffled off the most chocolate bars in Boston and our reward from the diocese was a concert from MC5. The brothers had heard about KICK OUT THE JAMS and ordered the band to change the lyrics. We threatened a strike, if they couldn’t perform the song.”

“And there was a compromise?”

“No, they did the entire album, except KICK OUT THE JAMS. When they left the stage without saying ‘motherfucker’, we stamped our feet and smashed chairs, chanting ‘motherfucker’ at the top of our lungs.”

“And?”

“The MC5 returned for their encore.”

“They say the word?”

“Yes, and we never wore ties, jackets, or uniforms again.”

“Amen to the revolution.”

Just as the sun set behind the Palisades, Frankie knocked on the door. The young drummer looked like he had spent last night on a roof and was in need of a fix more than Johnny. He wasn’t getting a bag of dope for free and Johnny got to his feet.

”Time to work.”

”It’s a little early to hit Times Square.” Frankie was shaking for his jones.

”Not Times Square, but some manual labor.”

The three of them descended to the lobby and moved the furniture to the steps of the Terminal Hotel. The snow had stopped, but the air was colder than in the morning. Charles’ Lincoln was parked by the curb.

”I like people who are on time.” Johnny had no watch. “It shows that he’s serious.”

”I was on time too.” Frankie boasted with a whine.

”And I’m proud of you too.”

The muscular driver got out of the car and popped the trunk.

”Sorry, I can’t help you.” Charles poked his head from the rear window.

”No need. We have enough hands as it is.” Johnny loaded the drum into the back seat and the amps into the trunk. The three of them made another trip upstairs for the guitars, which barely fit into the front seat.

”This will be a tight squeeze.” The driver didn’t like using the TownCar as a truck, but he was Charles’ man and said, “The name is Bobby and if I think you’re out to rip off Mr. Ames, then I rip off your ear.”

”Thanks for the warning.” Johnny opened the back door and the four of them rode in the cramped back seat to a block north of the Manhattan Bridge in Chinatown.

“This is it.” Johnny helped Charles from the car, pointing to the five-story commercial building. No lights shone from the windows and a faint stench emanated from the brick walls. Frankie hated stairs with the passion of any project dweller. “Is there an elevator?”

“Straight to the penthouse.” Johnny unloaded an amp.

“Sheer luxury after the Terminal.” Sean hauled his bass into the building.

An inhuman babble pierced the walls, as they filled the freight elevator.

Frankie asked, “What’s that noise?”

“And that smell?” Sean kicked at the feathers on the floor.

A door opened in the corridor and a sweating Chinaman threw a bag of bones from a harshly lit room.

Inside scores of laborers slaughtered hundreds of chicken. Another Chinaman dumped the bones into an industrial grinder. Johnny ushered the band onto the industrial lift, pressing the button for the top floor. As the elevator rose from the ground floor, the driver coughed, "Shit, that’d make a maggot gag."

"That’s why the rent is so cheap." Johnny smelled his sleeve for the reek and Sean tried to spit out the stench. “Now we’ve solved the mystery of General Tso’s Chicken.”

Charles had never smelled such a gut-churning odor. “Is this the best you could find?”

“Believe me I saw more worse places." A damp basement below Avenue C had been cheaper, although the shooting gallery on the second floor presented too great a temptation for Johnny or Frankie. “Here we have no neighbors to complain about noise, so we can practice at any hour.”

Frankie yowled at the top of his lungs and the other band members covered their ears. <

Last night’s bands at Max’s and CBGB’s had proven musical talent wasn't a prerequisite for this ‘scene’. Still Charles Ames III was partial to a voice more melodious than the chickens’ death clucks.

"Are you the lead singer?"

“No, I beat the drums.” The teenager rattled the tambourine in the air to annoy the rich kid. “Hey, Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me.”

“Nice try, next." Charles’ manner sat uneasily with the other three, for no band is a true democracy or a strict dictatorship and Johnny suggested, "Either Sean or me."

"Can either of you sing?" Charles lifted a dented microphone.

The Hung’s final gig had been for two spoiled brothers on Brush Hill Road. They had thought the world owed them a laugh. Sean had taught them what was funny when they had chained a deaf girl naked in a dog house and Charles was primed for a similar lesson.

"I was in a choir."

The squat Italian driver laughed from his belly.

He wasn’t in the band and Sean demanded, “Why you laughing?”

“You being a frigging choir boy.” The driver’s scoff suggested he only visited to church to rob the collection plate and the guitarist stepped between them. “Luckily GTH will never be hire for a church gig. Once we set up, we’ll find out, if who has a voice.”

"And if no one does?" The drummer was a drug addict and the bass had been recruited from a missing link clan. Charles would have never spoken to either before meeting Johnny and once more questioned the wisdom of this venture.

"This is a city of seven million people.” Johnny yanked at the elevator door and stepped into a darkened space like he had a cat’s night vision. “One of them has the right voice for GTH, but we don’t ahve to worry about that right now. Let's unload the elevator."

Johnny flipped on a light. The old loft was huge. The broad wooden floor planks bore the scars of heavy machinery and the tin walls were yellowed by age. The windows offered a spectacular view of Lower Manhattan, although the Manhattan Bridge was partially blocked by a billboard on the next building.

Charles swept a finger over the dust on a table. No one had worked here for years.

"Hey, I can see my breath," Frankie complained and Johnny shot the drummer an angry glance. He could without any negativity from his protégé. "Tomorrow we can score space heaters and clean the place. Anyway GTH isn't about interior design. It’s about music. Let's hear how we sound."

Sean struggled with his outlets and Charles rested on a radiator, as Johnny and Bobby assembled the organ. Mercifully Frankie assembled his drums without a hitch and tapped an intricate set of riffs on a battered set of bongos. The patter filled the empty space with the hint of the music to come. If nothing, it was fast and loud. When all the leads were in their sockets, Johnny handed them lyric sheets.

"This first song is three chords. Sean learned them in one day. Charles, you follow his bass. The beat's fast. 4/4 and the words are Sean's. He gets first shot at the mike."

“You mean ‘sing’?” He rarely sang in the shower.

"Singing’s the only way a bass player becomes a rock star." The guitarist spread his legs in a classic rock and roll pose.

Sean switched on his bass. A buzz emanated from the amp. His fingers were frozen on the strings and he stepped to the mike, longing for a miracle. Girls loved singers. His name would headline Rolling Stone. Electricity crackled through his body.

"On the count of three. One-two-three."

Johnny strummed the intro and Sean plucked the four bars. He hit the lead verse, fantasizing himself in front of a thousand screaming fans. "I want love-no-love and that's all I need. Tonight___ "

Johnny stopped abruptly and Sean opened his eyes. "Anything wrong?"

"One, you were singing the chorus, and secondly you have to play with us." Johnny tried to go easy on Sean.

”What do you mean?”

Frankie had been taught the conga drums by his uncle, a Tito Puente fanatic, and rattled off a relentless 4/4 beat.

"You ever heard of time, man, cause you were speeding and slowing down, instead of matching my beat."

"Sean will improve on the bass with practice." Johnny waved him from the mike."Unfortunately you won’t be a rock god in this lifetime."

"My singing sucks?" His mother had sung the lead in NO NO NANETTE. He had to retain a fraction of her talent.

"Like Frank Sinatra with a cold." Johnny could lie, cheat, and steal, but not about music.

"And that's bad?" CBGBs had STRANGERS IN THE NIGHT on the jukebox.

"Even for a punk band, yeah."

"Oh." Sean mentally erased his face from eyes of the screaming fans.

"So we have to find a new singer?" Johnny looked Charles. The millionaire halted his Gothic fugue on the organ. "None of my friends are musicians____"

"Dove?" Frankie enjoyed drug binges with the drag queen. Johnny cut him short with an irritability arising from his drought of dope. "One Wayne County is all this scene can handle."

"I have a singer." Sean raised his hand.

“Who you know?” The ex-hippie hadn’t left Johnny other than for sleep in room 301. < p>"This girl I met on the highway. A runaway. Brown hair, mini-dress with one shoe.”

“One shoe?”

“Cinderella, if you’re partial to fairy tales, only her voice is a mix of Tina Turner’s gravel and Dusty Springfield’s velvet."

The combination was intrigued Johnny.

"How old is she?"

"18." Sean thought at most Tammi was 16, but she had a valid ID for 18, if she got a dancing gig at that strip club.

“Where is she?”

"I left her in Times Square yesterday.”

“Times Square?”

“She's at a go-go lounge."

"Runaways last a pimp’s minute there?” Johnny lowered his guitar, as Charles Ames III fingered the first chords to LOVE-NO-LOVE.

"Bobby can bring him to Times Square and we can keep practicing."

"Mr. Ames, I'm supposed to take care of you.” The driver warily regarded the three other members of GTH.

Charles hobbled over to slip him a fifty-dollar bill, "Please do as I ask."

"I'll watch him," Johnny offered and the driver returned the $50, pulling Johnny to the elevator. "You might have ‘Chuckie’ fooled, but you mess with him and I'll throw you off the roof. You got me?"

"Sure, like the flu." Johnny had no immediate plans to harm Charles and told Sean, “Guess it's a go, but the girl doesn't work out, you give her the fifty cents for the A Train back to Times Square."

"That's fair." Sean zippered his leather and Johnny strummed the chords from Del Shannon's RUNAWAY with a laid-back expertise. Smiling at the musical reference Sean said, "I'll meet you CBGBs .”

Johnny handed him the bass.

"If you’re trying to talk a young girl into joining a band, it doesn’t hurt to act the part.”

"So I look like a rock star, right." Sean slung the instrument over his shoulder and the driver wrinkled his nose. "I'll take the stairs."

“I second the motion.”

The door slammed shut and the amps’ humming drowned the wind whistling through the windows. Johnny had slept a hundred worse places as had Frankie and he placed his fingers on the guitar strings.

"So we ready for rock and roll?"

”Never more.” Frankie was daydreaming about limousines and huge mountains of drugs.

”I’ll give it my best.” Charles was a little more relaxed without the other two men’s presence. That confidence might hurt him in the future, but for tonight he was safe and the trio repeated LOVE-NO-LOVE.

They could have performed tomorrow night at a strip club in New Jersey, however Johnny was aiming higher for GTH and he hoped that pure dumb luck would catapult them to this peak in a city too tough to respect any other advantages. It wasn’t too much to ask on the day after Thanksgiving.

MAYBE TOMORROW - A novel by Peter Nolan Smith Chapter 18

GAD-GAD-GAD

Sean repeated the chords four times in synch with the guitar and bounced into the hook, but he missed the bridge and Johnny dropped his hands in disgust.

“We’ve been practicing this song over for an hour and you haven't gotten the sequence right once. It's refrain, hook, refrain, hook, refrain, hook, bridge, and hook."

"Something is wrong with me.” With the Hung no one had cared about his timing, but Punk was more exacting than a garage band and Johnny’s patience was running thin. "Yeah.” Sean’s stubborn fingers resisted mimicking the marching Disney notes.

"Let's give it one more try." Johnny thumbed TAKE ME HIGHER’s bass line and on the count of four Sean hit the opening, then stumbled over the hook and guitarist’s face grew indistinguishable from the frustration the rest of the band had worn throughout the earlier rehearsal. This emergency session was his last chance.

Remembering his mother’s voice, Sean hummed one line, reached the break, and sang the hook aloud. He crooned the second refrain, the hook again, the third refrain, the hook, and flawlessly crossed the bridge into the hook. “Can you take me higher.”

"Holy shit." Johnny eyed Sean. "That wasn't a fluke, was it?"

"No.”

"We can always use another back-up singer." A little encouragement never hurt, although Johnny planned on turning down Sean's mike during rehearsals.

“I might even get my picture on the album sleeve.”

“Don’t push it.” They finished the five songs without a single flub and Johnny was ecstatic. "This breakthrough is a cause for a celebration. If we hurry, we can catch the Heartbreakers’ closing set."

"Tammi expects me to be waiting at the room." Sean enjoyed hearing her footsteps in the corridor and the click of the door latch as much as watching her undressed or sharing a shower in the hall bathroom.

"She won’t get back till 3. You can make it home with plenty of time to spare. Hey, it’s not like the Heartbreakers are living forever." Johnny wasn’t accepting no for an answer.

"Since you put it that way, why not?" Sean rested his bass against the wall.

"You're taking your bass?" Johnny was naked without his instrument.

"I'll give the rock star routine a rest tonight." The girls at Max's were more dedicated to saving the Heartbreakers from self-destruction than seducing a rookie bass with a girlfriend, plus he had a battered Rickenbacker for practice in his room.

"Up to you, my friend." Johnny slung his guitar over his shoulder and and wrapped a black silk scarf around his neck to conceal an eruption of sores. "You ready?"

”Whenever you are.”

The two of them filled their lungs and descended through the stench of the poultry killing fields. Hitting the deserted street, Johnny gasped, "Man, that's getting worse."

"You think one day it might get better.”

“I doubt it.” Something that bad only got worse.

Two Checkers approached, but Sean flagged a new cab off the Manhattan Bridge. Getting in the back, he told the driver, “Union Square.”

"What’s with your grudge against Checkers?"

"I used to drive them in college.” Sean saw the intersection before the Roxbury Projects clearly. “I ran a red light and nearly killed the driver of a Mustang, so I take the other ones now.”

"You graduated from college?"

"In four years." Sean had started as a scholarship math major. Smoking pot in his freshman had ruined his feel for abstract equations and LSD in his sophomore year had erased his ability to consider one plus one a simple equation. “I didn’t do so good.”

“But you finished?”

“By the skin of my teeth.” He had graduated sine laude in 1974.

“Why didn’t you get a real job?”

It was a good question.

“I’m not the type of person to have a real job. A bank interviewer called me a ‘drifter’.”

“You mean like Clint Eastwood ‘drifter’?” The term had all kinds of sexy connotations, but Sean shook his head. “More the ‘Dynamite’ kind of drifter.”

“He was in the Marines thirty years.”

“I could never stick with something that long.”

“Not even a relationship?”

“My longest was five years with my high school sweetheart.”

“Why it end?”

“Because I recognized I would never be able to settle down.”

“Does Tammi know that?”

“It’s not something we discuss, but she’s no fool.” Sean was very uncomfortable with questions he didn’t ask himself. Thankfully the taxi stopped before Max’s and he paid the fare. As they walked to the entrance, Sean said, “Maybe one day I’ll talk to her about it.”

“But not tomorrow.” Johnny was glad Sean wasn’t committed to Tammi. It gave him hope, although the ex-hippie saw it as more as despair. “No not tomorrow.”

They squeezed through the crush at the entrance and the doorman waved them into Max’s. The Heartbreakers were jamming to CHINESE ROCKS and the ex-New York Doll lead guitarist launched into a solo wrenched from the garbage dump of his soul. Dee Dee Ramone’s song about heroin addiction on the Lower East Side was a Punk anthem. The crowd was star-studded. Several waved to him and Sean started feeling good about his life. He had conquered the bass, had money in several banks, lived with Tammi, and was almost grateful to Johnny for persuading him to stay that first night.

As he ordered a beer, a soft hand slipped under his shirt. Supposing it belonged to Tammi, he backed into the inviting belly and a falsetto hissed, "Surprised, big boy?"

"No, I’d recognize that seductive voice in my sleep.”

“You dream about me?”

“No, just what you’d do to me.”

“Oooh, sexy.” Dove dipped her finger beneath his jeans.

“Sorry, I don’t trust myself.” Her fingernails scrapping the top of his pubic hair was a little too tempting for comfort and he pulled out her hand.

“Not many people do.” Most transvestites in Times Square or the 82 Club were hormone-ridden hags, however in bell-bottom pants, a silk shirt unbuttoned to her navel, and a flipped-out shag Dove resembled a lean Farah Fawcett ready to run away from her partners for a long weekend in a cheap hotel.

"You on a date with CHARLIE'S ANGELS fan?"

"He was more Bosley's brother.” Dove knew what straight boys liked and struck a Vogue pose. “Are my clothes a little out of place?"

"People here are too loaded to worry about your style." The girls wore streetwalker hand-me-downs and the boys clad in rumpled jeans and torn t-shirts.

"You care to join them?" Dove dangled a packet of white powder in the air.

"That doesn’t look like sugar."

"It’s a little of this and a little of that.”

“A Speedball by any other name."

"Hmmmm. China white and pink Bolivian is a sure-fire formula to create Queen for a Night.” Dove huffed a fingernail of powder. Viktor was in Brooklyn dropping off fake $20s and Tammi was working the Dollhouse. A rail of dope would lower Sean’s resistance to sex with a woman who was really a man. “How about crowning you King?"

“I’d love to.” His mother had accused him of losing his edge after smoking pot. She had been right, but this scene, the morning rush hour, work, sleep, sports, war, politics, religion, TV, the movies, and music were fueled by drugs, whether it is heroin, cocaine, steroids, pep pills, sedatives, booze, coffee, sugar, or cigarettes. Drugs were a way of life in America and no one was cold-turkeying from the mainstream, for even Billie Graham drank his coffee sweet, but a night with Tammi was more satisfying than any cheap high and he told Dove. "But I’m abstaining these days."

"All the more for me." Dove kissed him on the cheek. "Be seeing you in my dreams."

The band ripped into BORN TO LOSE.

Sean drank his beer, watching Patti Smith, Richard Lloyd from Television, Joey Ramone, Anya Phillips, Xcessive, Legs McNeil, Cheetah Chrome, Judy Nylon, Cookie Mueller, and Maria Duvall unabashedly performed for the reputed movie camera which Andy Warhol had hidden in the ceiling. A redhead from the play WOMEN BEHIND BARS licked her tongue over bruised lips and Sean might have accepted her invitation to the bathroom, if a man hadn’t said, "I'm talking to you."

"Me?" Sean shouted over the slagheap of noise.

"I almost didn’t recognize you without the wig.” The blonde biker from his first night in town shoved him into the bar. “Spotting your fag friend connected him to You."

Sean’s feigning ignorance about that fight was almost the truth, since his memory had been partially erased by Quaaludes. “Sorry, can I buy you a drink?”

"A drink? You busted my nose." The biker jabbed Sean’s chest with his finger and nodded to someone. "Sorry's not gonna cut it. You wanna fight?"

"You mean a duel in Union Square?”

“Duel?”

“Yeah, if I'm not there at dawn, start without me." Sean didn’t have the time for a brawl with a boltneck from New Jersey, but a hard metal object whacked him in the head and a loud ringing in his ears replaced The Heartbreakers. Another blow clouded his eyes with a misty nebula, as the biker launched a sucker punch. He might have broken his jaw, if Dove hadn’t stuck a lit cigarette in his eye.

“Take that, motherfucker.”

The biker screamed with blissless agony and Dove dragged Sean from the bar. He tumbled down the stairs and slumped against the door. The biker was on the top landing, wrestling with the bouncer. Dove lifted Sean to his feet and out onto the street, where she loaded him into a waiting taxi, yelling, "Move it."

"Okay, lady, I'm not deaf. Where to?" the driver asked over a West Coast Ranger’s hockey game. Dove threw ten dollars over the seat. "Just go."

Warm blood dripped red blossoms on Sean’s shirt and the driver expressed his concern by shouting, "Keep that off the seat."

"Just drive." Dove produced a Kleenex from her pocketbook and daubed at Sean’s face. The left side of his face was pocked with small lacerations and he asked, "What he hit me with?"

"A chain wrapped around his fist." Cheri wasn’t fussy about a little mess.

"Damn." An excruciating pain flared within his skull. At least he wasn’t missing any teeth. "Thanks for saving me."

“My pleasure.” Dove stuck a packet under his nose. “How about a pain-killer?”

Mindlessly Sean inhaled the powder. Its bitterness coated his nostril and he snorted another line. An acrid wetness hit the back of his tongue, then a warm heaviness kidnapped his body and he slumped into the seat, hoping no one paid the ransom. Dove wiped away the excess drug. “I’ve been thinking about you. Having you naked. Kissing your lips.”

"That's nice." Sean drifted deeper into the enveloping murk.

"And then doing things a woman could never do.”

"Sounds like a dream.” Sean was too drugged to visualize what Dove had in mind.

"Can I come home with you?" Dove leaned closer to Sean, whose silence was a pleasant change from Viktor’s half-translated horror stories about Brighton Beach.

"Your place?" His eyes rolled into his head, leaving him at Dove's mercy.

"No, yours." Viktor had a terrible habit of appearing at all hours at the Grammercy Park Hotel.

"Why not? The Terminal Hotel. West Street. Room 301."

“Tammi won’t mind?”

“Tammi thinks you’re great.”

"Then this will be a night you won't forget." Dove kissed him on the neck and told the driver. “The Terminal Hotel."

"You’re the boss, lady."

Stroking his arm Dove pretended that Sean was her boyfriend. As a prisoner in a man's body she was a master at self-delusion. Unfortunately when the taxi reached Jane Street, Sean was breathing shallow and she lifted his eyelids. His pupils were blind to the light and Dove swore, "Shit."

"Problem?" the driver asked, shutting off the meter.

"He had a little too much to drink." Dove couldn’t dump him in the street. "Driver, mind helping me with lover boy?"

"For an extra $10, sure.” The driver turned off the engine.

“$5.”

“It’s a deal.”

Inside the hotel the two struggled with the legless occupant of room 301. Their furtive exit two minutes later suited Ernie, for the clerk avoided problems after midnight. Concentrating on the NY Times Crossword puzzle, he forgot them their coming and going and that small gift of ignorance was his best guarantee that tomorrow would be just another day to forget even if the occupant of #301 didn’t make it through the night.

MAYBE TOMORROW - A novel by Peter Nolan Smith Chapter 21

Light pierced a chink in the drawn curtains and traversed the hotel room to the bed. A slash of silver struck Sean’s face and he groggily open his eyes. They were filmed with night dust and he rubbed them clear, then blinked upon seeing Tammi by the door in her second-hand school uniform and white shirt. She was a tantalizing vision of corrupted innocence and he said, "I stopped believing in God, but I always believed in angels."

"You must believe in miracles too.” Tammi pressed her thumb and index finger together. “Because last night you were this close to dead."

“It feels even closer this morning.” The left side of his head ached from the beating and twin spikes pulsated in his temples. There were too many blanks in last night to form a vague recollection of the evening's end and he asked, "How did I get here?"

"I don’t know. I found you in the hallway." Tammi's allure dissipated with the stark strobe of disapproval aimed at him.

Sean spotted a plastic bag by her feet. "Where are you going?"

"I'm leaving." Tammi picked up the bag.

“Back home?” His swift rise from bed revealed the extent of his injuries and he slumped against the wall.

“Not a chance of that.” Tammi wasn’t leaving New York. “I’m leaving this place and leaving you.” “I can explain last night.”

"Why bother? I told you from the beginning that if you did drugs, I was gone." She was strict on rules as anyone could be who hadn’t had any rules.

"Doing drugs was an accident____" Sean fought his way back to the bed, on which he sat in a near puddle of flesh and bones, suggesting that Man had evolved from the non-vertebrates, instead of the apes.

“I can’t live with excuses.” Tammi opened the door, bag clenched in hand.

“Tammi, listen.” He had to tell her something, but nothing came to his lips.

“No.” Words were a trap to make her care about someone who didn't care about their self.

“Why no?” He didn't deserve an answer.

“One summer my father took me to the amusement park at Salisbury Beach. I went on the rides. The shills gave me candy. I was so happy, then I found him with a needle in his arm. He had been dealing drugs on the beach and doing his profits. His partners gave him a hot shot. His dying hurt and so would finding you dead in bed.”

“I'm not like that.” He had never done heroin before, but couldn't tell her that he wouldn't again.

"You don't know that and I don't know that either." Last night had killed him in her heart. “Sean, I can't be with you under these conditions."

"I'm sorry I screwed up.” His life was a mess and she had to understand why. “Tammi, I have a temper. I fight.”

“I’ve seen that temper.” She had been frightened the night that he almost dropped the record producer down the elevator shaft,

”I know.” Sean stared at Tammi, hoping that she might recognize the honesty in his eyes.

“In 7th grade I was beaten by two older boys. I guess they plain hated me. They never said why. Whenever I tried to avoid them, they found me. Worst was the other students watched me these beatings. Not one helped me. A bum, Red Halley taught how to fight. Only if you’re scared, you can’t win a fight with bullies.” Sean clenched his fists, wanting to hurt the two boys’ faces as they had hurt him. “One day the biggest one, Mark Tully, threw a punch and I ducked. He broke his hand. The beatings stopped and I won a scholarship to a private school. I never saw them again.”

“But the violence never disappeared?” Tammi had experienced the same persecution in Kittery. She hated those girls for calling her names and despised the boys for believing those lies, but also herself for caring what they thought.

“No, it stuck around. I don’t want you to leave.”

"I don't want to leave either, but it's too late to not leave.” She wished that it was yesterday and she could stop last night.

Where are you going?” He was losing her.

"I don’t know, but I can’t stay here.” She turned her head and reached for the door knob.

"And the band?" He was grasping for burning straws.

"I'm staying in the band, so we will see each other." She couldn't look at him without changing her mind and told herself to be strong without knowing why. Her voice wavered with a brand-new sadness, which felt too much like all the old ones.

"Oh." Jefferson Airplane’s Grace Slick had shamelessly bounced through the band members in the Summer of Love and sung about a love triangle in TRIAD from CROWN OF CREATION. In GTH Tammi’s choices were down to Charles, although Tammi hadn’t demonstrated any visible reciprocation of the organist’s interest, then again her leaving might be a subterfuge, because dating a millionaire almost every American girls’ fantasy.

“Will that be a problem?” She wanted to hear yes.

“I won’t make it one.” Sean had dropped acid, worn bell-bottoms and long hair, and slept under the redwoods in Big Sur. He was no hippie and worried that his temper was a danger to the three of them.

“Good.” And good felt like bad.

"Johnny tell you that I'm singing back-up." He vowed to control any future outburst for her sake alone.

"I can use the extra help." Tammi turned around to Sean.

His left eye was nearly shut, his face was swollen, and his body was marked with black-and-blues. He had saved her on the highway. Sean needed her help, but she fled the room with tears in her eyes.

Her steps faded from the corridor and Sean sagged into the bed. His success with women in this room was terrible. He got up and shut the door, then tried to sleep, but couldn’t find a comfortable position and the nagging discomfort was not a result of his beating, but the heroin gnawing at his bone marrow.

He hadn’t thought it possible, but honor students at his high school had graduated overnight from pot smokers to junkie fiends. No one was smarter or stronger than this drug and Sean repressed a shiver. He couldn’t even remember if last night’s experience was good or not. All that remained was the drug’s siren call and Sean respected its power, for he could never promise that Tammi he wouldn’t do it again. Still he had too much on the line to become another statistic and Sean intended on showing Tammi that he was not her father.

No addiction was ruining her Christmas. Least of all not his.

MAYBE TOMORROW - A novel by Peter Nolan Smith Chapter 24

Caroline’s bisexual girlfriends at the Sahara bar warily touched Sean’s spiked hair and then enticingly fingered his studded leather jacket. He arrogantly acted the role of the rebel and the butch dyke bouncers were enraged by their clientele's traitorous heterosexual groping and asked Caroline and her date to leave the premises.

The next club was Les Mouches, where the gay boys drooled over Sean as the Second Coming of Marlon Brando. The music was too loud to speak, so he taunted them with sneers and a leather jacket draped over his shoulder. The queens were dying to get him into the back room. Poppers fueled the dance fever, cocaine lent the illusion of fame, and Quaaludes transported the dancers to a pagan morality. Sean resisted the drugs and reserved his body for Caroline’s libertinism.

After hours at Cisco’s Disco on 15th Street Sean had stripped off her shirt and banged a tambourine over his head. Men writhed with Babylonian excess next to the Giant Cisco Can. Men danced with Babylonian excess. Anything went in the crowded club. Caroline and he had sex in the bathroom. Men peered over the stall’s walls, urging to fuck her like a mercenary and Caroline demonstrated her versatility with a natural scorn directed at the voyeurs. It had been their night to shine amongst the stars and now the winter dawn was withering the velvet blue from a purgatorial sky and the World Trade Towers cast a lengthy shadow on the two bodies lying atop a man-made sand dune on the riverside landfill.

A rumble of powerful engines stirred Sean from his slumber on a pile of cardboard boxes. Her fur coat shielded their body from the cold. A powerful rumble of engines coursed along the Hudson and Sean nudged the blonde heiress.

”We better leave.” They were the only people in sight.

”What for?” She embraced him with a feline whimper.

"Anyone in those buildings across the street might mistake us for murder victims.” Thousands of windows overlooked the landfill.

“And they’d be dead wrong.” Caroline closed the fur coat to provide them a warm cocoon.

“The police might arrest us for trespassing.”

"The police are asleep this time of the morning, besides I was waiting for the slack tide. Look.” She nodded to the river.

A great ocean liner was steaming down the Hudson, flanked by two tugboats.

"One day all this will be covered by apartment buildings and you won't see this sight, unless you’re living in a luxury duplex. Have you ever been on a ocean liner?”

“No, but my Irish grandmother took my older brother and me on a ferry from Boston to Nantasket. A squall had struck halfway there and my grandmother had held us all the way to the Hull pier.” Any reference to their class difference between his Nana and her family was wasted on Caroline.

“I might know someone on board.” She stood up without her fur coat seemingly immune to the chilled wind. "This Englishman I met a couple of nights ago. He said that he worked on the Queen Elizabeth II. I was supposed to have met him last night, but I blew him off for you.”

”Lucky me.” Sean draped the fur coat over her shoulders. “You have any idea where it's going?"

The gust of icy wind blew her coat apart, exposing her breasts to anyone aboard the famed liner.

"First, it's a 'she' an it and secondly, she's bound for Southampton in England."

Her disdain of his ignorance was a product of her upbringing

“I forgot.” Sean hated her for a second, for she was right about the ship’s being women. His father’s side of the family had sailed the world out of Maine throughout the 1800s, but none of his generation had anything to do with the sea. ”Ships being feminine is strange when you think that seamen consider women on board a ship bad luck.”

”We’re only bad luck in love.” Normally Caroline would have stormed away from Sean without a backward glance, but this entanglement was in service of her brother and she softened her tone to say, “My mother and father’s parents had arranged their marriage. My grandfather gave them a cruise through the Mediterranean as one of their wedding presents. My father claims that they had never been happy on that ship, because they didn’t have to be who they were. They divorced right after our fifth birthday and my mother married a richer man once the divorce was finalized. We never see her. She lives in Rome and as children Charles and I pretended she drowned at sea.”

“What was Charles like before his accident?” Sean brushed the sand from his clothes, oblivious to her contempt of the middle-classes trying to pry into the lives of their betters.

“Charles was different and not only physically.” Her peers understood the purpose of the unsaid, but she decided to humor Sean. “He was smart, carefree, and expected to shine on every occasion. Funny, I’ve forgotten his negative attributes.”

“Everyone has a few.” Even rich people.

“I suppose he was full of himself, but then he had every right to be back then.” The fall had humbled him beyond need and Caroline breathed a sigh of regret that she hadn’t been able to stop him from climbing that roof. “We all have a high opinion of ourselves as teenagers.”

”Not everybody.” Tammi had been trampled in high school, but he had been lucky to have won a scholarship to a private Catholic school. His parents had been so proud. “I was brought up to be the best I could possibly be and the same was expected from the rest of my brothers and sisters. There are six of us.”

”Almost a tribe.” She envisioned them around a camp fire.

”More a clan.” His mother was devoted to their Irish heritage.

“How boring.” This wasn’t a criticism on Sean's upbringing, for Caroline was rarely entertained by the life chosen by her birth.

“Boring?” He didn’t accept any insults about his family.

“Everyone having to be alike, but isn't punk about changing who you were.”

”It is,” Sean answered, although everyone on the scene tended to dress in leather or black.

“And do you feel any different from before?”

”Not really.” Sean simply had more options than in Boston.

”It’s not easy to change.” She hated lying and cursed Charles for having to play this charade.

“I wish it was, but I’m trapped by who I am same as everyone else.”

“Middle class to the bone and I can’t be anything else.” Everything he said was a struggle, for in truth he would rather be with Tammi and his hole in his heart reminded him of his other failed romances from Cheri’s desertion to not being invited to the birthday party of sweet girl with pigtails. Her name had faded in the fog of time and Sean zippered his coat. “So now what?”

“You go your way and I go mine.” Most of the men and boys whimpered their ejaculation after three to five minutes. Sean had recovered faster than a marathon runner and Caroline needed to starve him of any advantage by refusing to acknowledge her desire for more.

"And that’s that?" Sean had gigged with the Hung at a high-school graduation party on Jerusalem Road. The expansive house had overlooked the Atlantic. The girls flirted with him, as if the band was the next Beatles, but after the last set, the father had seen them off the property as he would any hired help. Sean started to walk away from the dune only to have Caroline pull him back.

"Not so fast, sport. I enjoyed myself last night. You were fun.”

“I wasn’t trying to be fun.” Middle-class and poor males in America had fantasized meeting an upper-class girl, but Sean had never imagined that Caroline’s sophistication would be coupled with adult-film insatiability.

“That lack of effort is what I like about you. You’re a natural and so am I. There’s not many like us and believe me I looked for us.” She hooked her arm around his waist. “And you make it more fun and I might even give you a Christmas present."

“Why?” Sean hadn’t written a wish list after not getting a puppy for Christmas in 1962.

“For bad behavior.”

"Such as?" He wasn't giving her offer any serious thought.

Born to wealth Caroline was an expert at manipulating any man with no real material possessions.

"How about a motorcycle? A Triumph same as the one Brando’s in THE WILD ONES?"

"A Bonneville." Sean had crashed his last dirt bike after a high-speed chase eight years ago. He had snapped his left wrist and spent the weekend in the Provincetown jail. His uncle had told the judge that his nephew had run only after preventing townies from Truro beating a hairdresser. It was almost true.

“I admire a man who knows his desires.” Caroline ran from the dune, her boots kicking up spurts of sand.

The heiress’ recklessness endangered any reunion with Tammi, yet Sean chased her to the landfill’s unlatched gate and they waited for a break in the rushhour traffic on the West Side Highway.

“We'll never be able to cross." Sean panted and Caroline smiled wickedly.

"You care to bet?" She undid her fur coat to reveal her semi-nakedness.

The heads of the nearest drivers jerked to the right. Brakes shrieked and metal thunked on metal. They darted through the stalled traffic to the other side of the highway, where Sean tried to button her fur coat. “You're mad.”

"Can’t a girl have fun? Caroline flagged a taxi and sat inside, closing the door slightly to prevent his joining her in the back seat. "I'll meet you after rehearsal tonight."

The blonde millionairess blew him a kiss through the window and the taxi sped uptown.

On the other side of the highway several commuters were examining damaged fenders.

They were white-collar working stiffs and Caroline had enjoyed ruining their day. She undoubtedly regarded him as entertainment and ruthfully that’s all he had been last night.

Checking his pocket he discovered he had spent over $200. Money went fast with Caroline. He recalled the $310 deposited under the name of Allan Vaughan. It was early and the uptown traffic was light and probably even less in the West Village.If he pushed the taxi driver, five banks were not impossible and Sean hailed a yellow cab heading north.

”Where to?”

"Go to the bank on Houston and Varrick. I want you to wait for me. I'll be right out and we’ll drive to four more banks. Each stop will earn you an extra $10, okay?"

"You're the boss.” The driver flipped on the meter and the taxi sped away from the World Trade Towers.

At the first bank Sean punched in the pin code. He had picked 1099 for each bogus account from his address of his first apartment on Commonwealth Avenue. A minute later he pocketed $300 and returned to the cab, instructing the driver, "6th and 3rd. Right side."

After repeating the process there, they sped a block over to Christopher Street. Twenty minutes had elapsed sicne hitting the first bank and he had $900 cash in his pocket.

"8th and 14th." He gave the driver another $10.

The transaction on Hudson exhausted five minutes, leaving a little under thirty minutes to go to reach a fifth bank. This was his lucky day.

"You robbing banks, mister?" The driver looked in his rearview mirror with pregnant suspicion.

"No, I'm closing my accounts." Sean rationalized that the banks had foreclosed on houses and farms, bankrupted families, and hadn't given him a job after his graduation from college. They were in league with the military-industrial complex bankrupting New York. He dropped $10 into the front seat with a Maoist fervor. Stealing from the rich and sharing with the poor to support an affair with an heiress was the true worker state.

"Now head over to 5th and 14th." There were two banks at that location.

"I don't know about this." Most people were naturally honest, but shared the same weakness in a bad economy.

“Here’s $20 and you get another $20 at the last bank.”

The driver stepped on the gas and stopped on the corner.

He gave the driver another $20 at that adddress and he ran from one corner bank to another in a matter of minutes, increasing his take to $1500. The revolution was victoriously driving the forces of repression from the gates of utopia. The masses deserved to share this plunder and he almost shouted the secret of the ATMs to the commuters entering the subway. Ten minutes remained on the clock and he handed the driver a final $20.

"Last stop Union Square."

Jumping from the taxi, he climbed the stairs of a faux-Grecian temple to capitalism. An old lady was jamming a card into the ATM slot. She wore threadbare tennis shoes and a shabby raincoat. Sensing his impatience, the ancient crone turned apologetically to Sean, "Sonny, the bank took my money."

"Let me see." Sean read from the screen that the old woman’s account was without funds. "Seems the machine is broken."

He slipped in his card.

Thirty seconds later the machine dealt three hundred dollars Vegas-style in crisp twenties. Sean believed in Robin Hood and stuck the money in the old lady’s pocket. "It’s working now.”

"Yes, but I only had sixty dollars in the account." She stared at the money, as if it might be sucked back into the machine, then stuck the cash into her purse.

"Think of it as an early Christmas present from Nottingham Forest, ma’am." Sean ran down the steps and disappeared into crowds entering the Union Square subway station.

"Bless you." Tears dotted her eyes. She would have been happy with a twenty for her performance and stuck her card into the slot, trawling for pity from the next ATM user.

Brakes screeched on the street and two police cars disgorged four cops. A young policeman scrambled up the steps to aim his .38 at the old woman.

"Freeze, lady."

"I was just trying to get money." She acted innocent as adeptly as any con in the city.

"Kelly, holster your gun." Sgt. Weinstein shouted, for even a blind man could see this shattered old lady hadn't hit six banks this morning.

While the banks hadn't rectified the problem, the computers registered any extra withdrawals with the number 1099. The banker authorities had relayed this morning’s hits on the ATMs to his radio car and Sgt. Weinstein had trailed the thief through the Village.

The detective had arrived too late at Union Square, but the old lady must have seen him and Sgt. Weinstein asked, “Mother, have you seen anyone use this ATM recently?"

"A young man helped me with my bank card.” She stuck the fake card to her purse, thanking God the police were after her benefactor instead of her. “And gave me some money?”

”How much?”

”$100.” Something about the heavyset detective forced her to tell the truth, but not all of it.

"Can you remember anything else about this ‘nice young man’?" Sgt. Weinstein asked, smelling the faint scent of cat food. The city should be more worried about her impoverished situation, instead of a thief, whose crime spree hadn’t netted a fraction of the banks’ earning on the float from laundering drug money.

"Sort of a caveman with spiky short hair." She hated betraying the young man, but had six cats to feed.

"You remember the color of his eyes?" Sgt. Weinstein loosened his tie.

"Blue." The old lady tightened her thin coat for protection from a chilled wind rifling around the derelict S. Klein building.

"How tall?" Sgt. Weinstein started to construct a suspect from his mental list of thousand of criminals.

"A little shorter than you and thinner too."

"Clothes?" Sgt Weinstein saw a young man with blue eyes, white, spiky hair, a brutal face, but he didn’t figure him to be a career criminal, because the ATM thief had risked arrest to help this old woman.

"A motorcycle leather jacket, but he was no hoodlum."

"I'm sure his mother is proud of his consideration." In New York City only he cops, hustlers, bikers, and punks wore leather jackets. Johnny Darlino fit into two of the groups.

"This young man, he bad?" The old lady faked a shiver, hoping to avoid a visit to the 9th precinct where another policeman might recognize her from a previous arrest.

"No worst than anyone else in this city" According to the book he should have confiscated the $100 and stuck the old lady in a room with an Identikit artist, until she positively IDed the ATM robber, instead he yelled for a squad car to give her a ride home, then waved for the other squad car to resume its patrol and walked across Park Avenue South to the opposite sidewalk where several Seconal addicts were suspended in a mime’s mid-fall.

He searched the park with an expert’s eyes and then stuck his hands in his coat pockets.

The thief had escaped, but today had been close. Questioning Johnny Darling was a logic next step, except the young hustler was an expert at playing dumb.

Tomorrow he would stake out three more banks and issue the officers descriptions of Johnny and the old lady’s Good Samaritan. Bank robbery was a felony and if Johnny Darling was involved, then the guitarist would have to bargain his freedom with the DA and his snitching on his flock of sinners from the Strip would be a baby-step in cleaning up Times Square as a dangerous destination for so many innocent men and women living in this era of errors.

MAYBE TOMORROW - A novel by Peter Nolan Smith Chapter 26

Dojo's on St. Mark's Place offered a cheap breakfast and after finishing his bacon and eggs Sean met Caroline for a double-bill of THE KILLING OF A CHINESE BOOKIE and THE OPENING OF MISTY BEETHOVEN at the St. Mark’s Theater. The latter movie screened first. A few ragged men sat in the front rows to take advantage of the cheap shelter from the cold. Caroline and he moved to the back of the theater. They weren’t alone, but he couldn’t see Caroline’s hands in the dark, as they unzipped his Levis.

”Not here.” There was a word for Caroline, which Sean had heard it from Tammi on the way down to New York. Only her wealth saved her from any judgment.

”And why not?” She wasn’t listening to him and whispered, “Don’t you want to fuck me the same as the girl in the movie.”

”Not right now.” When he was a young boy, Sean had fantasized about rescuing a princess only to be rejected, because she was royalty and he was nothing.

”I know why. You’re thinking about Tammi.” Charles’ sister laughed under her breath. “Men are so stupid. She doesn’t want you any longer.”

”Because she wants your brother.” Sex wasn’t enough for him. He wanted more and more was not Caroline was willing to give him.

”I don’t know who she wants, all I know is that she doesn’t want you and I do.”

“I have to go.” Tonight was the gig at CBGBs


”Not yet.”

Her words mocked him, although not as much as his surrender.

Two hours later they walked out of the theater. She kissed him on the lips.

“I’ll see you at the show.”

Caroline flagged a cab and rode away without a backward glance.

Sean walked down to Chinatown in the grim afternoon light. He climbed the stairs to the loft. He was the first one there and turned off the space heaters to warm the penthouse, then sat on his amp, thumbing the bass. He played the entire set, singing the words, as if the lyrics could conjure up a magic spell to resurrect his romance with Tammi.

Unfortunately the age of magic had died with the burning of witches over three hundred years ago. A little before sunset the other members of GTH arrived, exhilarated by the upcoming gig. Johnny handed them a list of songs. "This is the set for tonight. Five songs.”

“Nothing more. Nothing less.” Tammi adjusted the height of the mike. She didn’t look at Sean.

“We’ll run though it a couple of times.” Johnny tuned his guitar and checked Sean.

The bass player was suffering from extreme self-pity and Tammi was miserable with Sean’s liaison with Caroline. Charles was fooling himself, if he imagined Tammi would one day be his, then again he had the money to finance this deception. Johnny opted to remain the bandleader rather than act as Cupid for their love triangle, which was a dangerous role in any circumstance, since a loser or winner inevitably hates you for helping the other person.

“Everyone ready?”

Frankie lashed on his snare. 


"Going to Hell tonight."

"One-two-three-go." Tammi shouted and the band launched into LOVE-NO-LOVE's bars with a ragged enthusiasm. At the end of the intro bar, the redhead screamed into the mike, "Been around this world too long. Gonna to say my good-byes."

The song was crude, powerful, stupid, and the band was easily seduced by its power. Sean shed his listless sorrow and Tammi abandoned her disappointment. The music bonded them spiritually and hopefully tonight’s audience succumbed to the song’s simplicity. The band hit the final note of closing song MAYBE TOMORROW and they collectively stopped like a car hitting a brick wall. Tammi dropped the mike, saying, "I'm ready as I'll ever be."

"I’ve been ready for a year." Johnny unslung his guitar. He needed each band members to play for GTH tonight. No love problems. No drugs. No star trips. At least while they were on stage. “Listen tonight, we’ll be nervous. It’s a natural reaction, but we’re going to hell and taking the sinners with us tonight.”

"GTH." Frankie rose from his drum kit.

“Let’s hit it from the top.

Sean and Charles took their time saying, "Ready, set, go."

They were rivals for one heart and Sean glanced at Tammi hundreds of times, hoping for her to decipher thousands of regrets babbling through his mind. The teenager offered no forgiveness and the reflected tension between the two shattered the redhead's voice tendency toward teenybopperdom and the band fed off her swelling intensity with insatiable appetites.

Johnny's guitar sparkled each set leading Frankie to tighten up on the drums and Charles's baroque organ blanketed the bottom with Sean's backing vocals compensating for his occasional flubs on bass. Bobby Vacca’s singing the chorus of MAYBE TOMORROW wasn't for show.

The driver liked them and not merely as a band. GTH respected nothing about the straight world. Johnny was clever, Tammi was cute, Sean was solid, Frankie was relatively harmless, and his employer was metamorphorsizing into a new person, as the quintet thrashed through Bobby’s favorite song LOVE-NO-LOVE.

They were better than good, although no promoter would dare booking GTH as an opening act for Genesis and Top Forty DJs would have to be paid hard cash to stick their songs onto the play list between Cheap Trick and Styx, however the band deserved this shot at fame.

Reaching the end of the song, Johnny put down his guitar. His body was exhausted and he needed some rest. The band looked at him and he said, “No more practice. We’re ready for tonight.”

”We are?” Sean leaned his bass against the amp. They had five songs. The Ramones had twenty.

”It’s a short set.” Johnny had timed the length. “Less than eighteen minutes and if they want an encore, we give them LOUIE LOUIE. Sean, Frankie, and Charles know the chords and I’ll write down the words for Tammi.”

”Are you okay?” Tammi was concerned about Johnny. He had never stopped after such a short time.

”I’m fine. A few hours sleep and I’ll be golden.” A day or two would have been better. He looked out the windows at the fading day. “I’m going back to the hotel. We should meet back here around 9 to pack the van. We’re slotted for midnight. We should be at CBs at 10:30, so if our friends come, they'll stay. I warned them that the only excuse for a no-show was jail or the morgue." Getting another gig depended on drawing a crowd.

"The Dollhouse is closing at 11 and the girls are coming with their dates." Tammi announced, winding the wire around the mike. Charles hadn’t seen many of his old friends after his accident. "My sister is handling my guests."

"I only know a few people from CBGBs," Sean offered weakly, packing his bass. A glance from Booby advised Sean to leave the two alone and the driver dissembled the equipment nearest the door. Johnny approached the bass player and asked, "Are you okay?”

“I guess so.” The quivering harpoon in his heart urged him to confront the two people on the roof, but he had decided to leave New York after tonight’s show. Where didn’t matter. GTH could go to the stars without him.

”You can’t get Tammi out of your head, can’t you.”

”No.” The ache in his heart was real.

”Funny, how things much you care about someone when they don’t care about you.” Johnny breathed shallow drafts. His chest hurt less that way.

”As if you ever have cared about anyone.”

”I care about people. I care about you or else I would have ripped you off that first night for every penny in your pockets and I care about Tammi and Charles and especially Frankie. No one has to care about anyone, but if you don't care about anyone, then you can never care about yourself.” Johnny waved away Sean. “Things will work out with Tammi.”

”How do you know?” Sean zipped up his jacket.

”A gypsy taught me how to see the future.”

”It’s a nice dream.” Sean visualized attacking Charles. It was a particular ugly image and breathed deeply ten times and said, "I’ll stay out of her way.”

“That’s very noble.”

“Noble has nothing to do with it.”

“Either way, I appreciate it and so will Tammi. Stay cool, I have to speak with Frankie.” Johnny walked over to his young friend.

"I told the 'boys' from the Strip that CBGBs was a new piano bar loaded with rich old queens." Frankie’s eyes were glazed from another visit to the Sunshine Bodega on Avenue C. midnight. Frankie, you got that?”

”Sure, what’s not to get? "

”The drummer stashed his sticks, wondering if Johnny had a $20 for him, then realized it was a bad time to ask for cash.

”Tammi, you want to join me for a shopping trip to St. Mark’s Place?” Charles limped across the penthouse to the elevator.

”If that means Trash n Vaudeville, count me in.” She had been eying a white plastic mini-skirt for the last week.

”Frankie, what about new boots? Call them an early Christmas present.” Charles would have preferred a one-on-one situation with Tammi, but the drummer ‘s boots were a disgrace.

”Thanks.” Frankie perked up, figuring that he could boost enough clothing in the basement store to score two dime bags.

”What about you, Sean?” Charles asked from the elevator, surrounded by Tammi, his driver, and Frankie. Johnny was sitting on his amp.

”I’m good.” Tammi was his only desire and she wasn’t for sale anywhere outside the Dollhouse. He tugged on his leather jacket and walked over to the frail guitarist.

”See you back here at 8.” Tammi blew a kiss, as the elevator doors closed on them.

”Johnny, are you really okay?” Sean felt the guitarist’s forehead. There was no fever.

”Fine, I just need a little sleep and here is as good as anywhere else.” Johnny laid down on a stack of cardboard boxes.

”Are you sure?” Sean pointed the space heater in his direction. He hesitated from broaching a forbidden subject with the blonde guitarist.

”You think I haven’t slept in worst places?” Johnny lay his head on an old towel. “Plenty worse that this.”

”Yeah.”

”You want some soup from Wo-Hop when I come back?” Sean was glad that

‘That’s be nice.” Johnny was resting his eyes.

Sean left the penthouse and walked down the stairs. The street was dusted by snow. A couple of Canucks were selling Christmas trees from the sidewalk to motorists off the Manhattan bridge. The pine smell reminded him that his promise to come home for the holidays. Christmas was less than a week away. He had to buy his mother a present, but any purchases could wait until after tomorrow night and he began singing to himself, "It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas."

Believing a lie was easy this time of year, especially those he told himself.